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Dungeon Girl Review – Why Play a Game When You Can Browse a Menu?

Dungeon Girl Review - Why Play a Game When You Can Browse a Menu?
Dungeon Girl Review – Why Play a Game When You Can Browse a Menu?
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Platforms:

Windows PC, Steam

Game Name:

Dungeon Girl

Publisher(s):

Fruitbat Factory

Developer(s):

Inu to Neko

Genre(s):

Menu

Release Date:

July 30th, 2018

Dungeon Girl from Inu to Neko

Dungeon Girl from Inu to Neko is the first game to confuse me in a long time. I’m not confused by the gameplay mechanics or the storyline. I’m confused as to why this game exists.

Let’s start by clearing the air immediately. The Steam description of Dungeon Girl states that it’s a “puzzle RPG that’s easy to pick up and play.” If that’s true, then the statement “The Witcher 3 is a historical regaling of actual events” is also true.

Dungeon Girl – screenshot courtesy Steam

Dungeon Girl isn’t much of a game; it’s more like a giant menu structure. The entire game is spent in menus – even dungeon exploration, if you can call it that. I most certainly would not call it exploration or a puzzle in any sense of their respective definitions. Dungeon “exploration” consists of clicking on squares with icons on them. Corresponding icons touching each other are removed together.

Match-three? Of course not. That’s silly. That would be a gameplay element. We can’t have that here. It reminded me a little bit of popular mobile RPG Dungelot, only with significantly less substance.

Dungeon Girl – screenshot courtesy Steam

Want to Explore a Dungeon? Too Bad! Click Around This Menu Instead!

Some of the icons are mysterious and could have treasure or an enemy ripped off from the Dragon Quest series hiding behind them. When an enemy appears, clicking on a sword icon is ideal, and if they manage to attack your character, then clicking on a heart icon will restore health.

Eventually, as squares are cleared, a staircase appears to descend to the next floor of the thousand-floor dungeon. This entire process is incredibly boring. I found myself speed-clicking just to get as far as possible, and afterwards, I was left with a gaping hole in my soul where solid gameplay usually resides.

Dungeon Girl – screenshot courtesy Steam

I’m Sick of This Menu; Let’s Go into a Different Menu!

Upon exiting the dungeon menu structure, the player is thrust back into the regular menu structure. Here, there is the option to craft up to 300 items – for little to no reward – or check in with your party members.

Friend points are acquired through “adventuring” with your “friends,” and these points can be spent on skills, items or pieces of story. To call them pieces of story is also fallacy. I would instead describe them as ridiculously asinine conversations. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a huge fan of anime and visual novels, and I’m not afraid of a little text or a seemingly pointless conversation between characters used for story or character development. Not the case here. I found it hard to care about these one-dimensional characters, and I couldn’t get through the text fast enough.

Dungeon Girl – screenshot courtesy Steam

On top of this complete lack of tangible gameplay, Dungeon Girl is played in a small window that’s unable to be upscaled. Why? If I started asking why every aspect of this game exists this article, would be extensively longer. Unfortunately, I can’t be bothered to spend any more of my precious minutes on this game, and neither should you. This a menu structure best avoided.

Dungeon Girl is available via Steam.

Rating: ★☆☆☆☆ 

Watch the official trailer for Dungeon Girl below:

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